Friday, October 23, 2009

What a Week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So this week has panned out rather differently than I expected, and it's not over yet!

Last Sunday I saw the fabulous Dr Blum for my post-Botox check up. I'd toyed with the idea of getting the fillers and mesotherapy but the reality is that at the moment it seems an unnecessary expense. I was more impressed with the little taster of Carboxy Therapy that he gave me on my thigh lift scars last time. While the scar was still there, it was a lot smoother and far less 'angry' looking. As he gave me a teeny touch up of botox in my neck, I told him that if I were to pay for any treatments it would be that.

Luckily for me its way cheaper than the fillers and stuff, and even luckier for me, he gave me a full session for nowt! He injected Co2 into my leg and tummy scars, even the scar where my new belly button is, and for the piece de resistance, he injected the Co2 into my neck! Now there aren't any scars there, but ever since I had all the excess skin removed from my neck, 18 months ago, I've had two red patches under each ear. It was like a cross between bruises and rosacea. Well less than a week after the treatment, its 80% gone!!!!! The carbon dioxide has done what massage and Creme de la Mer couldn't!

Dr Blum aka Dr Chez Vous works out of Beauty Works West in Lambton Place and I can't recommend him highly enough!

So that was Sunday, Monday was cool, bit of exercise, a flu jab and some socialising with a good friend. Tuesday started off well too, hardcore yoga, lunch with a pal and some work on my TEFL course. Tuesday night all hell let loose as the news broke that Regent Inns - Jongleurs' parent company - had gone into pre-pack administration and five venues were shut that day, for good!

Of course I had weekends booked in at all five clubs and a copy of a contract confirming this. Three of the weekends were just general shows but the other two were Xmas runs - the gigs that pay the income tax bill - so I wasn't best pleased to say the least!

I emailed the booker and on Wednesday received and email telling me they were going to honour the gigs and pay us. "Fabulous" I thought, "that sleepless night was for nothing". To celebrate I went out and saw some art - the incredible Ed Ruscha at the Hayward, who just blew my mind - and the Turner Prize Nominees at Tate Britain. My tip for the winner is Roger Hiorns. I even bought myself a piece of art in the shape of a silk scarf designed by previous winner Grayson Perry.

All the while, my thoughts were with the staff of the five clubs that closed, the rumours are that they are not even getting this month's salary, on top of being jobless at Xmas. Poor fuckers.

Thursday morning and I am just leaving the gym, en route to the library, when I get another call from Jongleurs telling me that the new owners have decided not to honour the gigs and pay us after all. Basically, contract or not, we have to get in line with everybody else they owe money to and hope for a few crumbs.

Now I am far from wealthy, but you know what? I would rather any money they were ever gonna pay me goes to the poor sods who've worked really hard running those venues and working in the kitchens, behind the bars etc., they are the real losers here.

Anyway, last night I was doing the lovely Funny Side Of... double up in the City and Covent Garden. I dunno if it was the threat of impending poverty and the thoughts of a dozen comedians chasing each gig or not, but I seemed to shift up a gear. I had two fantastic shows and came up with a ton of new stuff!

I'm off to Portsmouth later today to play the Wedgewood Rooms and I'm hoping this good vibe lasts. Maybe this week's events were the kick up the ass I needed!


Monday, October 12, 2009

Twelve Months After

Last Saturday - 10 October - marked 12 months since my final lot of plastic surgery in Kuala Lumpur. Thinking back on it all, it was a fairly traumatic experience - having to cancel my week with the orangutans being the most upsetting part to be honest!

A year later, are there any regrets? Nope. Not one. If you can't be bothered to read back to my blogs of the whole experience, I basically had a 360 degree body lift, and a thigh lift to remove the excess skin caused by my 10stone weight loss. It wasn't without it's dramas, like the stitches coming undone on the thighs twice, but the surgeon Dr Jalil was a fantastic man who put me at my ease.

I went there with a company called Gorgeous Getaways and I would thoroughly recommend them as a way of having plastic surgery abroad. The staff were really kind - especially Ndang who was my daily visitor, ready to run any errands I might have and even doing my laundry for me! On top of that she never once failed to make me laugh and see the bright side of the most trying of circumstances.

I can't say that it was much cheaper than having it all done here, but I did get a month in a six star hotel and the most amazing aftercare - which I wouldn't have gotten here for that price. This is the link to their site

The scars are still pretty severe, but as I was mincing around London this summer in my cut-off denim shorts and sunbathing in my bikini with not one ounce of shame, I knew it had all been worth it.

On the scar front, I saw a new botox doctor a couple of weeks back the wonderfully named Dr Chez Vouz - on account that he leathers up and comes to you on his motorbike armed with syringes full of wrinkle-busting poison. I actually went to him cos he works out of Beauty Works West in Lambton Place, W11. Its the third time I've had botox and Dr Blum was the third doctor to administer it, I have to say I think he's been the best yet! He also has this neat thing where you go back two or three weeks' later and he tops you up, thus avoiding the Danni effect.

If you wanna go and see him here's the link

Anyway in addition to freezing my face, Dr Blum also demonstrated a wonderful new machine he has to obliterate scars. He blasted a bit of the scar on the back of my left thigh, and whilst it hurt like hell, it's definitely faded a fair bit! I'm seeing him for my top-up this weekend so will find out exactly what it is he used.

Ain't science brilliant!


La La Liverpool

Soooo here I am, on the train in my bargain first class seat, and I am online! For free! How awesome is that? It feels like I am living in the future!

My Liverpool weekend was just amazing from start to finish. I had an incredible deal at my hotel, I got three nights in a 4* hotel for £60 total cos I had so many loyalty points. And now that I am a non-smoker they gave me a really amazing room with an enomous bed and writing desk and huge bathtub! The hotel also had a fabulous gym, pool and sauna suite, which I made full use of.

The gigs at Comedy Central @ Baby Blue were amongst the best I have ever had, especially Saturday night's which was so much fun. The line-up also included Chris Ramsey who is a fantastic up-and-coming act and a great MC, the lovely Chris McCausland and Mat Price, who I'd not seen before but enjoyed immensely. The audiences were wonderful and 'got' everything I said!

Its been a couple of years since I've gigged in the city and boy, has it changed!!!!!!! Entirely for the better too. The marvellous new Liverpool One development meant that on Friday I had somewhere to have lunch with the gorgeous Johnny Candon who was performing at the Rawhide comedy club, and on Saturday I had an endless selection of shops to visit!

Saturday also saw me take in a visit to the Tate Liverpool, where I saw three fabulous exhibitions - the Mark Rothko Seagram paintings, the Michael Landy/Tinguely show, and a terrific sculpture exhibition that took up two floors and was filled with all kinds of brilliant stuff! If you live anywhere nearby you really owe it to yourself to take a look. You don't even have to pay!


Wednesday, October 07, 2009

How Exciting!!!!!!!!

So tomorrow I am off to do some gigs at Baby Blue in Liverpool.

Its been ages since I played in the city and I am really looking forward to it. Not only do I have a fab hotel with a gorgeous pool and gym, but there's also some great exhibitions on at the Tate and the Walker Galleries. All being well I should be seeing work by Michael Landy, Mark Rothko, and Bridget Riley!

All that and a chance to show off for cash too!


Monday, October 05, 2009

Pop Life!

Not the Prince tune, the exhibition at the Tate Modern that opened last week. I was lucky enough to get an invite to the Private View, and got there before the crowds arrived. It was really comprehensive in that it had a bit of something by everyone - apart that is, from Richard Prince, his picture of a naked 10 year old Brooke Shields had been removed on 'police advice' before the doors were opened - but everything else was there and available to view.

You had to be 18 or above to see Jeff Koons fucking his ex-wife in both glass and in paint, both pieces are gorgeous, tho not really erotic. I love that fact that Mr Koons has given himself a rather large penis. Now that's what I call artistic license!

There's some Hirst, Emin, Warhol, Lucas, etc etc etc. Its a one stop PopArt experience.

If you are not that sussed when it comes to this genre, then this is a brilliant introduction, I would've preferred a bit more depth, but somehow the shallowness of the show suits the subject.


Chattin' Shit

Soooooo it's been far too long since I blogged and that is gonna change. I think doing the constant updates on Twitter (I'm MissJoJoSmith on there) have meant that blogging feels like I'm repeating myself, or something!

Anyway last week I did a load of gigs. Wednesday saw me hosting a Comedy Speed Dating night at Up The Creek. I'd never been to one before, so was fascinated to see how it works. I was pleasantly surprised to be really honest. Almost everyone was really young and attractive, and only a couple of the guys looked like rapists! There was also more men than women which surprised me immensely.

My job was to commentate on how thing were going between the 20-odd couples, but of course they were all so busy getting to know each other, that I was getting in the way really. At the end of the dating, everyone seemed really happy and one couple was snogging! Rob Collins did a set at the end and it was all a fabulous success I reckon.

Thursday saw me back in Greenwich for Up The Creek's 20th Birthday Party. It was a benefit for the Damelza Children's Hospice - a fantastic cause - and there was a right motley crew of comics there! Everyone from Chris Luby to the gorgeous Ninia Benjamin to Andrew Maxwell! Kevin McCarthy MC'd the opening section and I ended up being the first act on. I had a terrific time, really great fun. I stuck around for a couple of drinks and some delicious Thai food, along with a catch up with some of my most favourite people.

Friday and Saturday saw me at Battersea Jongleurs hosting fantastic bills on both nights. I had a real blast and even got a chance to see the fabulous Tara Flynn who turned up with her handsome fiance on Saturday night to watch the early show.

In the 90 minute break in between shows, myself, Nick Wilty and Rudi Lickwood were all interviewed by Phil Butler for the comedy podcast he does. I was dead impressed at how professional both the technology and his interviewing skills were. Listen to it yourself at or click on the title of this blog to go to the site. There's 14 other shows to catch up on!